


Smooth Talkers Association

by RaeTheStar



Series: Hermitcraft Oneshots [12]
Category: Hermitcraft
Genre: Gen, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-16
Updated: 2019-09-16
Packaged: 2020-10-19 17:55:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20661350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaeTheStar/pseuds/RaeTheStar
Summary: The STA confronts the Convex about the tomfoolery happening on the server as of late.





	Smooth Talkers Association

A knock at the door startled Cub and Scar out of their lounging. They _had_ been meditating, but quickly found it wasn't for them, and instead decided to eat cake on the couch. "Come in?"

Jevin and Joe stalked in, their arms folded behind their backs, heads held high.

"What can we do for you?" Scar tilted his head, eyeing the strange behavior.

"We, the representatives of the STA, are here to investigate and put an end to your tomfoolery." Jevin declared, pulling out a small id badge.

"You'll have to be more specific." Scar grinned.

"The server has been under assault by the claws of your drones, and the people demand retribution!" Joe's glasses glinted.

"Alright, let's have a civilized conversation, shall we?" Cub piped up, offering the nearby couch to the pair.

They politely accepted, breaking their facade to thank their friends.

"Now! What is the meaning of these shenanigans?" Jevin started.

"Well, in retirement, we've rediscovered our love for potion-making and the arts, so we've been testing out a few contraptions." Cub shrugged, taking a bite of cake.

"Can we go back a sec? What does ST.. STC stand for?" Scar interrupted.

Jevin proudly displayed his small, homemade badge again. "The STA stands for Smooth Talkers Association. We're here on behalf of the server, to convince you to stop the prankage."

The Convex shared a glance, and grinned. "We'll stop, on one condition." Scar giggled.

"Drink these potions." Cub displayed two potions, filled with a bubbling purple liquid.

"Okay, so this is exactly what we're trying to get you to stop." Joe suppressed a chuckle and pressed his fingers together.

"Just one more? Please?" Scar gave them puppy eyes, rendering them helpless.

"Fine.." They each took a bottle, and chugged them quickly.

"This should only take a moment." A smile grew on Cub's face as Jevin and Joe held their heads in pain.

"Augh... What on earth was that?" Joe groaned.

"Well, supposing we added the right ratio of sugar to blaze powder, you should have swapped bodies."

"What!?" Joe tried to lift his head, but his hands were stuck to his face. He pulled harder, and blue strings of slime stretched from his head to his hands. "Jevin!"

"Man, you're blind!" Jevin laughed as he squinted through one glasses lens.

"Jevin! I am in a much more dire situation! How do I maintain a physical form!" Joe cried as his hands melted slowly.

"Oh yeah, haha! Okay, you just wanna focus on it. The slime can take any shape, so just focus."

Joe fell silent, staring into his hands. Ever so slightly, the fingers extended to a normal length, not dripping as quickly. "This is difficult."

"Eh, you'll get used to it."

Meanwhile, Scar and Cub cackled. Scar had fallen over laughing, and Cub hugged him, tears rolling down his face. "Why have we never swapped Jev? This is fantastic!"

"Har har, now how long will this last?" Joe scowled at his arms, which refused to obey him.

"Eh, dunno. We may have spilled the redstone dust, so it might be a while." Cub shrugged.

"Fine by me! Bring human is great!" Jevin laughed, but was cut short by a piercing stare from Joe. "We're gonna need to have some slime lessons."

Joe simply glared as he slowly melted into the white jacket, disappearing with a whimper.

**Author's Note:**

> I guess this one makes a lil more sense if you read the oneshots in the order I posted them, but eh, it’s all for fun lol


End file.
